"Just so you guys know, I have been going against our social norms and listened to R&B all morning."

(Addressed to Britney and Justin).

"What kind of shit is this? Are they saying I'm not Fresh?!"

(In response to Smith's new self-checkout system. The system no longer greets the customer as a "fresh values customer" but simply as a "valued customer." It should be noted that I hadn't showered for a few days when I made this remark.)


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