Showing posts from May, 2008


It's funny that a movie like Sex and the City can make me feel so awkward.

Amanda, Amanda, Amanda: three different women, all fans of an HBO television show based on relationship failures and successes. The new movie made me cry for joy of friendship and cry for loss of love and cry for happy endings. I'm a sucker.

I'm deliriously tired but want to jot down quickly that I'm lonely. While home I've spent time with an almost lover, a romantic interest, an ex boyfriend (or two or three) and a few men in pursuit of me. Sadly only one of these encounters felt rewarding. I miss sharing my night's rest with my love. I miss having meaningful and understood conversations. I miss excursions and celebrations and cooking for two. I'm paranoid I will remain loveless for too long. I don't want to be an old maid.

"Ain't no sunshine when she's gone...."

"...It's not warm when she's away. Ain't no sunshine when she's gone, and she's always gone too long any time she goes away."

I love this song.

Being gone too long has taken away some of my sunshine and I'm ready for a refill. I'm coming home next week for a visit and respite from the always-changing world of AmeriCorps NCCC. Twice now in only a few weeks have I broken down in tears, having grown tired of leaving the places and people I love so much. I'm in a slump and I need help pulling out of it-- I think my mom's home cooking and the laughter of friends and family will help. In 8 days I will be home for an entire week. Ahhh.

This project has been trying, to say the least. Spending 8 hours a day sorting donated clothing for a rummage sale feels mindless and I'm trying hard to keep the perspective of "reuse and recycle." I am lucky to have such a kind and understanding woman as our sponsor. We will host the giant sale this com…

Book Review: Manchild in the Promised Land

As I supposed, the end of Manchild in the Promised Land came tonight to a bittersweet end. Claude Brown lived an intense life, dealing drugs, getting shot, robbery, and a life spent running away from life, all before was even a teen. He was one the lucky few growing up in Harlem in the fifties-- he did his crime and served his time before his problems become part of his permanent record. He somehow kept himself out of the haze of heroin all of his friends seemed to be caught up in. He somehow kept himself out of jail when all of his friends were being sentenced to time. He finished high school, went on to college, and made a life for himself. Sadly, because he was able to pull himself away from the scene and work toward a future, he had to pull himself away from everything he had known. He watched his friends get killed during petty crimes, watched them kill for drugs, and watched them kill themselves with their addictions. He saw his family for what they were, including his younger b…

Killing Time

Reading family blogs, drinking a vanilla latte, and playing mind games with myself. Hmm. Random tag response:

A) pick up the nearest book
B) turn to page 123
C) find the 5th sentence
D) post the 5th sentence

Book: A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier

Sentence: He spat at the corporal's face, and the corporal immediately shot him in the head at close range.

If you'd like an introduction to the book, read this article. This is what turned me on to the memoir. I'm a sucker for sad stories... I cried.

Hey Girl, Heeeeeeeey

Morgantown, West Virginia has seemed pretty neat so far and if I weren't dependent on the van for transportation I think I would be having a lot more fun. It's hard living so far out of town and having to negotiate driving times and plans and all that jazz. Also, because we live so far out of town and the roads are winding with no shoulder, I will not be able to ride a bicycle as planned. Sigh.

I hate to seem like Debbie Downer but I've been fairly homesick and I don't have much motivation for this project. Our plans have changed quite a bit because of issues the different organizations have encountered and there's even talk of us getting pulled from this project and sent somewhere else part-way through. The Greater Morgantown Area Youth Commission had their building taken from them by the city and given to a museum organization of sorts so all the work they had done so far is canceled and they are left homeless again. The city has changed plans so many times now-- …


I leave Jackson, MS tomorrow to begin my road trip to Morgantown, West Virginia. We'll drive 7 hours tomorrow, stay the night in Knoxville, Tennessee, and then finish up our trek on Saturday. I'm excited to get out of this hotel and into my new, temporary, life.

Morgantown, oh Morgantown, how glad I am to meet you! I've missed my bicycle so much since leaving Utah and look forward to pedaling around the hills of West Virginia. There's a cool used bike shop near where we will be working and I'm going to try and get a deal and bring back my favorite activity. While in Morgantown we will be living at a Boy Scout Camp! Rumor is that we may move into town for part of the project but we'll see.

Our project consists of 3 different organizations and areas of work.
Greater Morgantown Area Youth Commission: Working the the Youth Council to build a Teen center where the youth can socialize. We will be doing actual construction on the interior of a building they've alread…

Late nights.

Keeping myself up into the wee hours of the morning is always a bit of fun and tonight I spent my time watching Law & Order (hotel=TV), knitting, and reading a book titled The Color of Water-- A Black Man's Tribute to His White Mother. Since leaving Utah and finishing 3 Cups of Tea (a book I recommend) I have pursued no intellectual endeavors and feel the need to dig into a few good books and I look forward to being in a college town where I might purchase a few used textbooks to lug along with me in the journey. Perhaps losing over half my belongings was fate. It freed up much-needed space!

Life after AmeriCorps, a plan of action I need to work on ASAP, is overwhelming. I've thought a lot about what I'd like to do and where I should direct my efforts and I still think If I never give up on doing good I should end up in ok shape. I am still fascinated with people, our interactions, our lives, and since joining AmeriCorps my interests have been piqued (once again) in the…